president trump
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Trump Shoves NATO Leader, Makes Stupid Speech and Embarrasses America
President Donald Trump is the drunk uncle demanding that the DJ at the cookout turn the music down because he wants to make a speech. Everyone knows what’s coming and everyone is nervous. On Thursday the president and our NATO cousins all got together for a little hangout time, and when Trump got the mic,…
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Manchester Bombing: UK Won’t Share Intel With US Because Trump’s Administration Can’t Stop Leaking Information
Because the Trump administration can’t hold water, not only has the president had to come out and denounce reported leaks coming from someone in the White House, but police in Manchester, England, are no longer sharing details of their investigation into the most recent terrorist attacks with their American counterparts. On Thursday, Donald Trump issued…
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Trump Met the Pope, and Clearly the Pope Hates Him
On Wednesday, President Donald Trump met with Pope Francis, and the pope literally looked like the part of America that didn’t vote for this man. Here is a photo of Pope Francis in happier times: And here is Pope Francis, much like most of America, now: The pope looks like he’s the lead singer of…
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Layoffs Looming as No One Wants to Stay at Trump’s NYC Hotel
Since he won the election and became arguably one of the most scandal-ridden presidents since Richard Nixon, room rates are falling at Donald Trump’s five-star SoHo hotel in New York City, and up to 15 percent of the housekeeping staff may lose their jobs. According to radio station WNYC, which combed the hotel’s financial documents,…
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Trump Writes Summer-Camp Goodbye in Holocaust-Museum Guestbook
It’s one thing for President Donald Trump to be an American embarrassment. For better or worse, he is the crazed uncle who stays in the basement at Grandma’s house. He’s the American family’s shame. So Trump’s first visit overseas as president is making all of America look bad, and if you ever wondered why the…
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Trump Hates Old Poor White People, Too
I bet a lot of old, poor white voters who stumbled into the voting booth to pull the trigger for Donald Trump are secretly regretting that decision every day. That’s because Trump used their racist hatred for blacks and catered to their xenophobia and innate hatred for Hillary Clinton to ride that wave into the…
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Trump Is Spilling All the Tea Because He’s a Messy Bitch
President Donald Trump is the friend you tell a secret to, a secret that clearly is directly connected to you, and when you hear that secret come back to you, you know exactly who said it, and when you question him, he defends it by saying, “But I never said your name, though.” During a…
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If America Can Self-Correct, Then TrumPutin Is Heading for Impeachment
Can you feel it? The walls are closing in on this Negan-ass administration. It feels like it’s only a matter of time—except I don’t trust this Republican Congress, which makes me feel like we might have to endure years of this, and that would be horrible—but for now just go with me. Let’s act as…
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When Russia Wants to Prove the US President Isn’t a Liar, It’s Time to Break Up
It’s a sad day for America when the Russian president is willing to provide transcripts of the conversation between the president of the United States and Russian officials in order to prove that the U.S. president isn’t lying. On Wednesday, Russian President Vladimir Putin said that he would be willing to provide Congress with a…