president trump
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‘I Can Tell You 2 Fish That Don’t Stink’: How Anthony Scaramucci Is Bringing Mob Talk to the White House
White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci, aka Scaramucci Mane, is a proud Italian American who at times sounds a lot like Ray Liotta from Goodfellas. I think this is not only purposeful but also plays into a stereotypical belief about tough Italian men—and I think Scaramucci likes it this way. Let’s remember that Scaramucci Mane…
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Nooooo! Sean Spicer Resigns as White House Names Anthony Scaramucci as Communications Director
Noooooooooooooooooooo!!! I can’t deal with this life! The one shining star in President Donald Trump’s abysmal and hopelessly clueless Cabinet was White House press secretary Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer. Now the New York Times reports that Spicy Facts offered the Trump administration his resignation after strongly objecting to the news that Trump had hired a…
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Big Mad: Trump Says He Never Would Have Appointed Sessions if He’d Known He Wouldn’t Have His Back With That Whole Russia Thing
Where are your president’s handlers when he needs them? Does he even have handlers? Is there anyone in the White House in charge of making sure he doesn’t say stupid stuff to the media he is so critical of? Apparently not, because this latest thing is a doozy. In an interview with the New York…
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Donald Trump Jr. Is as Old as Patti LaBelle’s 1st Solo Album; He Ain’t a ‘Boy,’ Beloved
In October 1977, Patti LaBelle released her self-titled debut album. Two months later, on New Year’s Eve, Donald Trump Jr. was born. LaBelle’s eponymous debut was released to critical acclaim; the spawn of that Sith Lord sitting in the White House, hollering at cable news all the time—eh, not so much. The two creations do…
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53 Percent of White Women Voted for Trump, Who Just Told France’s First Lady: ‘You’re in Such Good Shape … Beautiful’
White women confuse me. They always have. If last election vote totals are to be believed, then 53 percent of white women in America voted for the sexist-in-chief, yet 100 percent of white women also sympathize with the fictional white-lady slaves in The Handmaid’s Tale. Let’s just put aside for a moment the fact that the…
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The President of the US May Have an Imaginary Friend Named Jim
The president of the United States is in Paris to meet with French President Emmanuel Macron. I wonder if Donald Trump has any plans to meet with his friend “Jim.” According to the president, Jim used to love Paris, but now Jim doesn’t go anymore because the city is fraught with foreign extremists. I wonder…
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President Reportedly Signed Off on Trump Jr.’s 1st Statement on Russian Lawyer Meeting
Donald Trump Jr., aka Not-Ivanka, does a pretty good job of being an idiot on his own, so I find it hilarious that President Donald Trump’s administration reportedly helped compose Not-Ivanka’s initial response to allegations that he met with a Kremlin-linked lawyer who he believed had dirt on Hillary Clinton. And get this: President Vladimir…
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Russian Lawyer Contradicts Trump Jr.’s Account of Meeting: I Didn’t Have Clinton Info They Wanted
A week ago, Natalia Veselnitskaya was just a Russian lawyer with a really difficult last name to pronounce. Now Veselnitskaya is at the center of a Russia-White House scandal, and it still doesn’t make her last name any easier to say aloud. Depending on whom you believe—the lie trapped inside the fib, which is trapped…
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Chelsea Clinton Claps Back at Trump Over G-20 Ivanka Sit-in
Because President Donald Von LonelyFace, who can’t seem to keep the names of any of the Clinton clan off his tiny Twitter fingers, has of course made his G-20 flub of subbing in his daughter Ivanka to hold his seat about the former first family. “When I left Conference Room for short meetings with Japan…