president trump
-
There’s a Serious Hennessy Shortage in America, and It’s Actually Donald Trump’s Fault (Seriously)
Hennessy is a criminally overrated cognac. I maintain that it’s actually more fun to say “Hennessy” than it is to drink it. Because Hennessy tastes like ATM runs at 3 a.m. Hennessy tastes like puddle water and penitence. Hennessy tastes like it should be called “Omarosa.” But overrated doesn’t mean unimportant, since it exists as…
-
The President of Those Who Love Deer Jerky Is Trolling Obama on Twitter Again
We all know that President Tiny Fingas can’t control himself when it comes to social media. Like a teenage girl (sorry, teenage girls) whose frenemies must pay, the president has gone on an epic Twitter rant for the ages and has confirmed the widely held speculation by those in states that have more than one…
-
Make It Last Forever (Keith Sweat Voice), Don’t Let Our War End: Afghanistan Edition
President Donald Trump is becoming a master at the nonspeech speech, and nothing says nonspeech like Monday’s treatise on the 16-year war in Afghanistan. Every man who has ever been caught cheating has given a nonspeech. It works like this: Throw out tons of misdirection; offer some truth; admit some fault—usually not the fault that…
-
Judge of Characters: The ‘Alt-Left,’ White Genocide and Other White Nonsense That Doesn’t Exist
This week, we’ve been faced with more Donald Trump make-believe. In a delayed press conference after the tragic white supremacist riot in Charlottesville, Va., we all watched in horror as Trump mentioned that he was supposed to be addressing veterans benefits but Charlottesville happened. And then he basically ignored the loss of a life and…
-
Here’s Why the CEOs Leaving Trump’s Councils Aren’t Heroes
When I was in the seventh grade, my dad gave me firm instructions to come home after school. My middle school was across the street from a mall, which meant that after school, everyone hung out, and my dad didn’t want me in the mall getting into trouble, since a group of kids had been…
-
Trump Has Folder With Photos of Him on TV Looking Powerful Delivered to Him Because He’s a Child
I wish this were a joke. Seriously, I wish that the president of the White Walkers wasn’t this shallow and embarrassing, but according to a Vice News report, this dumbass has a folder full of positive cable news clippings, articles, interview transcripts, tweets and even “photos of Trump on TV looking powerful” delivered to him…
-
Trump Retweets Unnamed-Source Report on North Korea Condemned by UN Ambassador Because He Doesn’t Know What the Hell He’s Doing
Because Donald Trump has no clue what the hell he’s doing in office, and because no one in his staff can keep his dumb ass off Twitter, he tweeted out an anonymously sourced story (because, you know, Fox News), and within hours, United Nations Ambassador Nikki Haley condemned the same story on Fox News. Trump…
-
Watch: The White House Human Resources Be Like …
The Be Like series on The Root focuses on the commonalities we all share when it comes to various topics. Thus far we’ve tackled subjects like dating, voting and dieting. The latest episode focuses on the revolving door in the White House. Everybody and their mama has either resigned or been fired from their post…
-
The President Just Told a Room Full of White Cops That He’s Cool With Police Brutality. Here’s Why I’m Not Bothered
The president of dividing the United States is at again. If he isn’t on Twitter sending out transphobic, racist, sexist or xenophobic tweets, he’s holding speeches in front of hordes of like-minded followers. On Friday the president of white-American hatred delivered a speech to law-enforcement officers on Long Island, N.Y., during which he encouraged police…
-
Sen. John McCain Came Through and Laid That ‘No’ Down Like … : A Story Told in GIFs
Early Friday morning, the seven-year effort by Republicans to repeal Obamacare came to a thundering end—at least for now—when Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) came through and dropped that no vote down like: McCain’s unexpected no vote came against the GOP’s “skinny repeal” plan—basically a hodgepodge version of earlier Republican proposals to replace Obamacare—and, as I…