president trump
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Now Former White House Chief of Staff John Kelly Wants to Tell His Truth. GTFOH
Former White House Chief of Staff John Kelly is now telling his truth, which could mean a few things: He’s gotten a grim medical diagnosis and wants to make right with the Lord. He’s got a book to promote. He really hates Trump now and wants to stick it to him. Whatever the reason, Kelly…
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Insufferable Trump Holds Up Newspaper With ‘Acquitted’ Headline and Blasts Dems During National Prayer Breakfast
We all knew that the impeachment acquittal of President Donald Trump was going to make him even more impossible to tolerate, and in his first public appearance since convincing Republicans that they better stay the course, Trump didn’t disappoint. On Thursday at, of all places, the National Prayer Breakfast, Trump walked onto the stage like…
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Trump Refused to Shake Nancy Pelosi’s Hand and Other Petty Moments From the State of the Union
The State of the Union under the Trump administration has become a congressional version of the mythical Hater’s Ball. Everyone goes but everyone hates everybody. It’s basically a sorority step show without the stepping. There is more shade being thrown here than all of the Housewives series combined. Even the guests, invited by members of…
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Trump Asked John Bolton to Help Pressure Ukraine 2 Months Before the July 25 Call
While all of us have heard about the July 25 phone call that Donald Trump had with Ukrainian President Seymour Shutupsky (like you know his name and how to spell it), according to former National Security Advisor John Bolton’s unpublished manuscript, nearly two months before that call, Trump wanted Bolton to help pressure Ukraine and…
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President Trump’s Border Wall Refuses Breathalyzer, Field Sobriety Test After Being Caught Falling Down
Question: What do Trump’s bullshit border wall and the London Bridge have in common? Answer: Both of them shits stay falling down. On Wednesday, images of Trump’s impenetrable border wall, which was supposed to be made of some the toughest rhino skins and strongest elephant tusks, began popping up on Al Gore’s internet. The wall,…
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Trump Will Be the First President to Attend an Anti-Abortion Event. 53 Percent of White Women Wept
President Trump has been clear since day one that he will not be the president of all Americans. In fact, he’s been pretty clear since the beginning that he only planned to represent white supremacist men. If you think that a person like this would have had a hard time being elected, you’d be forgetting…
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Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s 7-Member Impeachment Hit Squad Includes Hakeem Jeffries and Val Demings
On Wednesday, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi announced the seven House members who will prosecute President Trump’s Senate impeachment trial, and while the usual names are there (we see you, Judiciary Committee Chairman Jerrold Nadler (D-N.Y.) and Intelligence Committee Chairman Rep. Adam B. Schiff (D-Calif.)), we also see black members Democratic Caucus Chairman Hakeem Jeffries (D-N.Y.)…
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Trump Spent Crazy Money on an Ad to Run During Jay-Z’s Super Bowl
If the whiteballing of former quarterback Colin Kaepernick isn’t enough to boycott the NFL, how about Beyoncé’s husband crossing the picket lines to bring us a halftime show starring Jennifer Lopez and Shakira? The NFL is so racist and ridiculous that ESPN talking forehead Stephen A. Smith actually came back to his roots, arguing that…
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2 Articles of Impeachment Approved Against Trump as the Mad King Loses His Mind on Twitter
In a move we all saw coming but it still took forever, the House Judiciary Committee approved two articles of impeachment against President Quid Pro Hoe. After a marathon arguing session Thursday night that looked a lot like arguments in my house, the Judiciary Committee voted along party lines to impeach the president, making him…
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Former FBI Lawyer Is Suing FBI, the Justice Department, and Trump Still Can’t Keep Her Name Out of His Mouth
Former FBI lawyer, Lisa Page, whose “fuck the fat orange guy running for president” text messages with another FBI employee were leaked to the media, is suing the Justice Department and the FBI for being messy AF. From CBS News: Her attorneys argue in the suit that the revelation of her text messages violates the…