Very Smart Brothas
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There’s Nothing ‘Fringe’ About These White People
The comforts in considering the white nationalists in Charlottesville, Va., to be fringe are obvious. For white people, speaking of them and their views as if they’re unique and anomalous allows them (the “good” white people) to distinguish themselves from these racists, while also minimizing their ubiquity and influence. If they’re fringe—if they only exist…
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Those Va. Police Really Fucked the Dog in Charlottesville, Eh?
If you’re like me, you’ve been glued to the television for much of this morning watching the events unfold in Charlottesville, Va., as white nationalists descended into the city for a Unite the Right rally in protest of an earlier City Council decision to remove a statue of Confederate general Robert E. Lee. If you’re…
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Maybe We Should Stop Inviting Omarosa to Things (and by ‘Things’ I Mean Conventions, Cookouts, Clambakes, Church … )
… barbecues, game nights, brunch, sleepovers, car pools, anywhere west of the Mississippi River, day parties, commencement ceremonies, Trap Yoga, Trap Painting, Trap Karaoke, Trap Wine Tasting, Trap Skunk Hunting, Trap Trapping, casino nights at Schenley Gardens Senior Living, Caribana, Carnival, HennyPalooza, Must Love Beards, Must Love Beekeepers, Must Love Beekeepers with Beards, half-marathons, dinner…
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An Ode to Bone Thugs-n-Harmony: The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles of Hip-Hop
Claiming that I don’t smoke marijuana is technically a lie. Because I have. But that lie is more true than the truth because I’ve only smoked (maybe) 15 times, and referring to myself as a “weed smoker” would be misleading. I’ve tried to enjoy it, but I’ve come to accept that it’s basically the same…
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Fortunately, Ezekiel Elliott Just (Allegedly) Beat His Ex-Girlfriend but Didn’t Sit During the Anthem, so He’ll Be Back Soon!
Earlier today, ESPN reports, sentient cash register wrapped in a Jos. A. Bank discount-rack pocket square Roger Goodell rained mediocre vengeance and slightly perturbed anger down on the hopes of the Dallas Cowboys and their fans as the NFL suspended Ezekiel Elliott six games for a series of alleged domestic abuse instances in 2016. These…
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My Strange Addiction to My Strange Addiction: Hold Me
I have family in town. This means that control over my television has been relinquished to whoever gets to it first. Also, my family is my mother, and if Momma wants to watch a show, Momma is going to watch a show. It’s why I’m currently watching all of the court shows on television and…
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The 20 Whitest Things White People Say to Black People, Ranked
20. “Oh, you’re married?” 19. “Is that your hair?” 18. “I don’t see color.” 17. “Can you turn that down?” 16. “DUUUUUDE, TAKE A SHOT WITH ME!!!” 15. “This section is reserved.” 14. “He doesn’t bite.” 13. “I voted for Obama.” 12. “Yeah, you’re black. But not like, black black.” 11. “If you can say…
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Shit Bougie Black People Love No. 34: The NABJ Convention
Perhaps you noticed that your bottomless brunch spot was a bit less crowded than usual Sunday afternoon, and all of the bottles of room-temperature water placed on tables were left untouched. And then, when attending Trap Pumpkin Carving class last night, you looked around and saw you were the only one there! Disturbed and confused,…
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Stuff (Only) Black People Say, or Nah?
I wonder if black folks are the only ones who say certain stuff.
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Raphael Saadiq Is the Most Underappreciated R&B Artist of All Time. Yeah, I Said It
On March 17, 2017, terrible human being-turned-terrible human being plus chicken-wing savant, Rick Ross, dropped his ninth studio album, Rather You Than Me. The first song on the album is called “Apple of My Eye.” As I listened to this song for the first time, a very familiar voice, one I’ve been listening to since…