En garde, bitch! I imagine thatโs how a sword fight starts in 2019.
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Police have a suspect in custody following a fight that took place in an Anchorage mall food court, resulting in a knife stabbing and a sword slashing, according to police. The suspect apparently had a small arsenal of an ax and some swords, making it pretty easy for police to grab him, believe it or not.
He and another manโpolice think knew each otherโgot into an argument. No word on whether it was about whether Charlieโs or Auntie Anneโs lemonade was better. One was escorted out but came backโand was woefully unprepared for the renaissance faire arsenal the suspect had on him.
Upon seeing the man return, itโs unlikely the sword wielder screamed, โBy the power of Grayskull!โ But itโs hilarious to think he did, so I certainly will. He reportedly pulled out a knife and stabbed the other man in the upper body, after which the victim was somehow able to grab a small sword and wound the suspectโs leg. Between that and the fact that he came back to a fight with a motherfucker who literally had several swords, I have to assume the victim was some incarnation of Beatrix Kiddo. Both men are fine.
Police will apparently release the suspectโs identity and the charges filed against him sometime today.
For my part, Iโm just trying to confirm what Iโm already assuming about the backgrounds of these two very ridiculous and also very much alive men, whichโฆ Well, youโll notice that I have this post in the โWypipoโ category. If Iโm wrong, Iโll admit as much, but I donโt think I am!
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